How to Hook Up with Friends| Rules For Hooking Up With Friends
From my experience, hooking up with a friend is a shit-show whirlwind of amazingness and like that description, it makes absolutely no sense. Logically, if two people are already friends AND find each other sexually attractive, wouldn’t they have the necessary ingredients for a relationship recipe? In a Disney Movie? yes. In the messy real world? Yeah right! Thus, the strong chance exists that your “bed friend” will still be prancing all over town with other partners whilst enjoying escapades with you and (here’s the kicker) tell you about it since you are such good “friends”. In some cases, depending on your type of “friendlationship”, you might even MEET the other specimens of pleasure in a chance encounter [NOTE: if this occurs, try and resist the urge to drink a bottle of vodka to the face. Take it from me-it only makes everything worse]. While most of us logically know that hooking up with friends is in the “danger zone” and probably should be avoided at all costs, logic doesn’t kiss well and your friend does so we do it anyways. Although not recommended, if you must enter into the this murky undefined world of friend hook ups there is a way to avoid some potential emotional landmines with something I like to call –Friendiquette.
The use of friendiquette is very important because it shows your “buddy” that they fall into a different category of hook-up Friendiquette gives your friend the peace of mind that they are still important, as a friend and otherwise, despite the fact you are not in an exclusive relationship. Here are some Friendiquette courtesies that I have found very beneficial in the past:
Always Wash Your Sheets: Lets face it-after every random hook-up we don’t always wash what we’re supposed to. With your friend however, your bedding should always be crisp and clean. Most likely your friend will know you’re hooking up with other people and will appreciate the extra effort made for them (even if it means doing two loads a day).
Have a designated day set aside: While this might not always be possible it is good to have a day of the week you both know is reserved for your “escapades”. This takes out all of the confusion about when you’re just hanging as friends and when you’re doing more. Once this day was set up for me, it was nice to know another girl wasn’t going t be around rather than wondering if I was in the “friends zone” that night.
Keep your friend informed: Your friend should always be in the one-up position over other hook-ups. This means letting them know, however awkward, what the situation is. Although it was sometimes hard to hear, I appreciated being in the loop about other girls so I wasn’t caught off guard.
If you fall for someone else, break it off: Although the sex might be absolutely amazing with your friend and it might be a little scary to forgo the buddy hook-up for something else, you have to let it go the minute you have feelings for another person. A friend of mine was caught in a situation where she was kept around by her so-called “friend” as a back up in case it didn’t work out with this other girl. In the end she was left hurt and without a friend. If you’re honest with your friend from the beginning, the less chance that there will be bad blood when the “friendlationship” inevitably ends.
So there you have it. Some very essential friendiquette rules and courtesies that will help you navigate the messy amazing world of friend hook-ups. Just remember, you deserve respect and the rest should fall into place.