Party Bathroom Woes | Freshmen Chronicles

Here’s a simple equation: party = people (alcohol × weed) + music – rules. Let’s emphasize

on the alcohol aspect of this. Booze is essential at any college party, but one of the downsides of drinking is making constant trips to the bathroom. The bathroom has its fair share of problems, so here are some tips to dealing with them:

  • Long lines. One of the most irritating problems can happen before you even get into the friggin bathroom! First of all, how many people are in line? Are there more girls than guys in line (they’ll take longer in the bathroom than a guy)? Maybe try and find another bathroom if you can’t wait.
  • No toilet paper. Check around the bathroom, maybe there’s a cabinet with an extra roll or two? Nothing? See if there are tissues or maybe some cotton facial pads if you’re in a girl’s house (p.s. ladies, it’s never a bad idea to get some individually wrapped feminine wipes to keep in your bag!).
  • Piss on the seat. Being one of three daughters, I don’t think anything grosses me out more than walking into the bathroom and seeing piss on the toilet seat. I have guy friends who were potty-trained to aim by their moms putting Cheerios in the toilet bowl…do I need to do that with every guy who enters the bathroom? The most logical solution is to just suck it up and squat, but if it’s really bad, fold up some toilet paper, put it on the seat, and use your foot to clean off the seat.
  • The stench of shit. So you finally get into the bathroom and it doesn’t just smell, it reeks. You don’t want the next person to walk in and think you just took a post-Taco Bell dump, so switch on the fan and try searching for a way to deodorize the air. Look for some Frebreze, maybe a scented candle, or in a worse case scenario, spraying some Windex might even help. Another note for the ladies, if you have perfume, spray as MINIMAL an amount as possible, just enough to cover up the smell but not gag the next person with floral scents.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.